Tahereh Mafi

I want you to be happy," I tell him, my eyes searching his. 'I want you to have a family. I want you to be surronded by people who care about you," I say. 'You deserve that.

Because I was dying.__And Warner could__e let me die. He was angry and hurt and had every reason to be bitter. I__ just ripped his heart out; I__ let him believe something would come of our relationship. I let him confess the depth of his feelings to me; I let him touch me in ways even Adam hadn't. I didn't ask him to stop.__Every inch of me was saying yes.__And then I took it all back. Because I was scared, and confused, and conflicted. Because of Adam.__Warner told me he loved me, and in return I insulted him and lied to him and yelled at him and pushed him away. And when he had the chance to stand back and watch me die, he didn__.__He found a way to save my life.__With no demands. No expectations. Believing full well that I was in love with someone else, and that saving my life meant making me whole again only to give me back to another guy.__And right now, I can__ say I know what Adam would do if I were dying in front of him. I__ not sure if he would save my life. And that uncertainty alone makes me certain that something wasn't right between us.

I__ a starving child trying to stuff my stomach, gorging my senses on the decadence of these moments as if I__l wake up in the morning and realize I__ still sweeping cinders for my stepmother.But then Adam__ lips press against my head and my worries put on a fancy dress and pretend to be something else for a while.

I'm in love with you.""Good grief." She kept walking.

I count everything. Even numbers, odd numbers, multiples of 10. I count the ticks of the clock i count the tocks of the clock I count the lines between the lines on a sheet of paper. I count the broken beats of my heart I count my pulse and my blinks and the number of tries it takes to inhale enough oxygen for my lungs. I stay like this I stand like this I count like this until the feeling stops. Until the tears stop spilling, until my fists stop shaking, until my heart stops aching. There are never enough numbers.

I__ not sure. But there__ something about the darkness, the stillness of this hour, I think, that creates a language of its own. There__ a strange kind of freedom in the dark; a terrifying vulnerability we allow ourselves at exactly the wrong moment, tricked by the darkness into thinking it will keep our secrets. We forget that the blackness is not a blanket; we forget that the sun will soon rise. But in the moment, at least, we feel brave enough to say things we__ never say in the light.

My body is cracking from the pain I have swallowed so Many times, heaving with sobs I can no longer suppress, my dignity dissolving in my tears, the agony of these past few days ripping my skin to shreds.

The afternoon our story begins, the quiet parts of being alive were the busiest: wind unlocking Windows; rainlight nudging curtains apart; fresh-cut grass tickling unsocked feet. Days like this made Alice want to set off on a great adventure.

Hate looks like everybody else until it smiles

I never thought it would get this bad. I never thought the Reestablishment would take things so far. They're incinerating culture, the beauty of diversity. The new citizens of our world will be reduced to nothing but numbers, easily interchangeable, easily removable, easily destroyed for disobedience.We have lost our humanity.

The moon is a loyal companion.It never leaves. It__ always there, watching, steadfast, knowing us in our light and dark moments, changing forever just as we do. Every day it__ a different version of itself. Sometimes weak and wan, sometimes strong and full of light. The moon understands what it means to be human.Uncertain. Alone. Cratered by imperfections.

And he leans in, so carefully. Breathingand not breathing and hearts beatingbetween us and he__ so close, he__ so close and I can__ feel my legs anymore. I can__ feel my fingers or the cold or the emptiness of this room because all I feel is him, everywhere,filling everything and he whispers__lease.__e says __lease don__ shoot me for this.__nd he kisses me.His lips are softer than anything I've ever known, soft like a first snowfall, like biting into cotton candy, like melting and floating and being weightless in water. It__ sweet, it__so effortlessly sweet.And then it changes.__h God___e kisses me again, this time stronger,desperate, like he has to have me, like he__ dying to memorize the feel of my lips against his own. The taste of him is making me crazy; he__ all heat and desire and peppermint and I want more. I've just begun reeling him in, pulling him into me when he breaks away.He__ breathing like he__ lost his mind andhe__ looking at me like something has brokeninside of him, like he__ woken up to find thathis nightmares were just that, that they never existed, that it was all just a bad dream that felt far too real but now he__ awake and he__ safe and everything is going to be okay andI__ falling.I__ falling apart and into his heart and I__ a disaster.

Beautiful enough to lure in prey, he said. Strong enough to clamp down and destroy, he said.

She could see all of Ferenwood from here: the rolling hills, the endless explosion of color cascading down and across the lush landscape. Reds and blues: Maroon and ceruleans. Yellow and tangerine and violet and aquamarine. Every hue held a flavor, a heartbeat, a life. She took a deep breath and drew it all in.

How strange that we can go from friends to inseparable to hateful then casual all in one lifetime.

I__ not an idiot, Kenji. I have reasons for the things I say.___eah, and maybe I__ just saying that you have no idea what you__e saying.___hatever.___on__ whatever me____hatever,_ I say again.__h my God,_ Kenji says to no one in particular. __ think this girl wants to get her ass kicked.___ou couldn__ kick my ass if I had ten of them.__enji laughs out loud. __s that a challenge?_"It__ a warning,_ I say to him.__hhhhhh, so you__e threatening me now? Little crybaby knows how to make threats now?___hut up, Kenji.___hut up, Kenji,_ he repeats in a whiny voice, mocking me.

His hands are holding my cheeks, and he pulls back just to look me in the eye and his chest is heaving and he says, "I think," he says, "my heart is going to explode," and I wish, more than ever, that I knew how to capture moments like these and revisit them forever. Because this.This is everything.

Kenji has a hand pressed to his mouth, desperately trying to suppress a smile. He__ shaking his head, holding up a hand in apology. And then he breaks, laughing out loud, snorting as he tries to muffle the sound. ____ sorry,_ he says, pressing his lips together, shaking his head again. __his is not a funny moment. It__ not. I__ not laughing