funny-but-true

American girls shivered and quivered at the Aussie accent whispered against their bodies.

Chocolate cake and a diamond ring? In bed with the man of my dreams?

Whenever you feel like feeling like a devil's advocate, Bible-thump. That, in a worldly world, is the great irony and satire of evangelism.

I am not sure if women are attracted to genius. Can you imagine the wise wizard winning the woman over the gallant swordsman? It seems rather otherworldly in more ways than one.

The logic behind patriotism is a mystery. At least a man who believes that his own family or clan is superior to all others is familiar with more than 0.000003% of the people involved.

Psychobabble attempts to redefine the entire English language just to make a correct statement incorrect. Psychology is the study of why someone would try to do this.

Slap-stick comedy is really funny, unless you're the one getting slapped with the stick.

I feel as though whenever I create something, my Mr. Hyde wakes up in the middle of the night and starts thrashing it. I sometimes love it the next morning, but other times it is an abomination.

If I were to vote, I would intentionally vote for the goofiest candidate. It is my theory that when the people can outwit the leader, the more respected their voices will be.

He who laughs last ... just didn't get the joke.

Don't, but if at all, then, lie to the whole damn world - never to your own damn, silly stupid self.

Do not believe in a god who is as silly, and meaner than you. For, that would surely be your higher-self, and your stupid alter-ego.

Don't worry. Life goes on. With or without you. So, live it, while it's given you.

All humans are rogues. Cured only by death.

It's probably not easy for a woman to understand what it's like to be a man. Imagine you're starving, and someone puts a huge buffet in front of you. There's delicious, mouth-watering food all around you, and it's really really hard not to eat it all. That's what it's like to be a man around attractive women. The urge to want to hump everything that moves is part of a man's natural programming. It's a deep-seated hunger. To suppress that hunger takes civilization and a lot of willpower.

We men are fascinated by the things we don't really understand. It gives us something to think and talk about: like females, they drive us nuts.

The manlier you are, the harder it is to understand what a woman wants: there is not a hint of female brain in you.

Pure wisdom is the 'fruit of life' banal platitudes are the 'bane of existence'.