cookie

The common man prays, 'I want a cookie right now!' And God responds, 'If you'd listen to what I say, tomorrow it will bring you 100 cookies.

Did you catch the time-of-great-suffering thing?__er expression softened. __an you just make sure I__ not around when it happens?___o can do,_ I said, strolling back to my office with a negating wave of my hand. __f I have to suffer, then so does everyone else within a ten-mile radius.__he pursed her lips. __hat ever happened to taking one for the team?___as never much of a team player.___acrificing yourself for the greater good?___ot that into human sacrifice.___uffering in silence?__ stopped and turned back to her, my eyes narrowing accusingly. __f I have to suffer, I__l be screaming your name at the top of my lungs the whole time. You__l be able to hear me all the way to Jersey, mark my words._- Charley to Cookie

Have you slept yet?''Sure. I took a power nap on the way over.''Didn't you drive there?''Yeah. Other drviers kept waking me up. Car horns should be illegal.'- Charley & Cookie

Don't you want to know what cookies is a code word for?" "No! Good God, no!

Do you want a cookie?- What?- A cookie. Like an Oreo. Do you want one?- No.- How can you not want a cookie?- I just don't.- Okay, fine,let's say you did want a cookie. Let's say you were dying for a cookie, and there were cookies in the cupboard. What would you do?- I'd eat a cookie?- Exactly. That's all I'm saying.- What are you saying?- That if people want cookies, they should get a cookie. It's what people do.- Let me guess. Dad won't let you have acookie?- No. Even though I'm practically starving to death, he won't even consider it. He says I have to have a sandwich first.- And you don't think that's fair.- You just said you'd get a cookie if you wanted one. So why can't I? I'm not a little kid. I can make my own decisions.- Hmm. I can see why this bothers you somuch.- It's not fair. If he wants a cookie, he can have one. If you want a cookie,you can have one. But if I want a cookie, the rules don't count. Like yousaid, it's not fair.- So what are you going to do?- I'm going to eat a sandwich. Because I have to. Because the world isn't fairto ten-year-olds.

Happiness isn't a fortune in a cookie. It's deeper, wider, funnier, and more transporting than that.

That__ the thing about the collapse of civilization, Blake. It never happens according to plan _ there__ no slavering horde of zombies. No actinic flash of thermonuclear war. No Earth-shuddering asteroid. The end comes in unforeseen ways; the stock market collapses, and then the banks, and then there is no food in the supermarkets, or the communications system goes down completely and inevitably, and previously amiable co-workers find themselves wrestling over the last remaining cookie that someone brought in before all the madness began.

Everyone needs to calm down! Okay, you got a weird cookie. So what? I don__ mean to swat your ego here, buddy, but this smacks a little narcissistic for me. God is not trying to communicate to you through a cookie. It doesn__ work that way. God__ not all Jack-and-the-magic-beans and tooth-beneath-the pillow voodoo. You don__ just close your eyes, flap open your Bible, and slam a steak knife into a verse. It__ that sort of thinking that leads to witch trials and Senate probes.

Am I alone in this mother-food connection or does being with your mom trigger the sudden and voracious need for large amounts of mac & cheese, rice pudding, and the scraps along the side of a bowl of cookie dough?

Some people just don't have what it takes to appreciate a cookie.