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charley-davidson

/charley-davidson-quotes-and-sayings

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Since I didn't have a candy wrapper to help me with the bad connection I was about to have, I resorted to using vocal sound effects. When Agent Carson picked up, I started my performance. "Agent... Agent Carson," I said, panting into the phone."Yes, Charley." She seemed unimpressed, but I wasn't about to stop now."I--I know who the kshshshshshsh are.""I'm a little busy right now, Davidson. What is a Ksh, and why do I care?""I'm sorry. My kshshsh... is kshshsh... ing."I repeat. What is a Ksh? And why do I care if it is ksh-ing?"She was a tough one. I knew I should have waited and bought a Butterfinger at the Jug-N-Chug. Those wrappers crakled like Rice Krispies on a Saturday morning. "You aren't listeni--kshshsh.""You're really bad at this.""Bank ro-ksh-ers. I know who they kshshsh.""Charley, if you don't cut this crap out."I hung up and turned off my phone before she could figure out what I was trying not to tell her and call back.

DJ
Darynda Jones

Fourth Grave Beneath My Feet

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Did you catch the time-of-great-suffering thing?__er expression softened. __an you just make sure I__ not around when it happens?___o can do,_ I said, strolling back to my office with a negating wave of my hand. __f I have to suffer, then so does everyone else within a ten-mile radius.__he pursed her lips. __hat ever happened to taking one for the team?___as never much of a team player.___acrificing yourself for the greater good?___ot that into human sacrifice.___uffering in silence?__ stopped and turned back to her, my eyes narrowing accusingly. __f I have to suffer, I__l be screaming your name at the top of my lungs the whole time. You__l be able to hear me all the way to Jersey, mark my words._- Charley to Cookie

DJ
Darynda Jones

Third Grave Dead Ahead

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Gemma Davidson,_ she answered, her voice as groggy as I felt. __here are you?_ I asked. __ho is this?_ __lvis._ __hat time is it?_ __ammer time?_ __harley._ __id you text me? Did your car break down?_ __o and no. Why are you doing this to me?_ She was funny. __heck your cell._ I heard a loud, sleepy sigh, some rustling of sheets, then, __t won__ come on._ __ot at all?_ __o. What did you do to it?_ __ ate it for breakfast. Check the battery compartment._ __here the hell is that?_ __m, behind the battery door._ __re you punking me?_ I heard her fumbling with the phone. __em, if I was going to punk you, I wouldn't simply turn off your phone. I would pour honey in your hair while you slept. Or, you know, something like that._ __hat was you?_ she asked, appalled.