Peter Ustinov

Since we are destined to live out our lives in the prison of our minds, it is our duty to furnish it well.

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine.

If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can't be done.

In America, through pressure of conformity, there is freedom of choice, but nothing to choose from.

Monica Seles: I'd hate to be next door to her on her wedding night.

I am an optimist, unrepentant and militant. After all, in order not to be a fool an optimist must know how sad a place the world can be. It is only the pessimist who finds this out anew every day.

Courage is often lack of insight, whereas cowardice in many cases is based on good information.

The point of living and of being an optimist is to be foolish enough to believe the best is yet to come.

The habit of religion is oppressive, an easy way out of thought.

At the age of four with paper hats and wooden swords we're all Generals. Only some of us never grow out of it.

Corruption is nature's way of restoring our faith in democracy.

If Botticelli were alive today he'd be working for Vogue.

Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit.

Laughter would be bereaved if snobbery died.

A diplomat these days is nothing but a head waiter who is allowed to sit down occasionally.

Sex is a conversation carried out by other means. If you get on well out of bed half the problems of bed are solved.

Parents are the bones on which children cut their teeth.

Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.