Debra Dunbar

Do I look like I'm compelled to do anything? Do I seriously look like anyone could compel me to even bring them a coaster?"She looked me over again. "You look like you're compelled to cause trouble, but I doubt that's the boss' directive.

Where are we?_ I interrupted Gregory as he spoke with the other angels. He looked around. __ntercourse, Pennsylvania._ I snorted__e said __ntercourse_. What a great name for a town. I needed to move to Intercourse, Pennsylvania. I wondered if there was a Climax, Pennsylvania? Gregory__ lips twitched. __es, there__ a Climax, Pennsylvania. It takes about four hours to get there by car from Intercourse._ I didn__ know what was more funny, the fact that Climax was four hours from Intercourse or that the two angels standing beside Gregory had expressions of horror on their faces. An archangel, the archangel, had just made a sex joke. Damn, I loved him. __ can get there faster,_ I choked out between laughter that nearly brought me to my knees. __ecause four hours from intercourse to climax is cause for immediate medical attention._ He waved a hand. __or paltry humans, maybe. Four hours for an angel is a quickie._ Those other two angels looked as if they were ready to sink through the ground. __h, please, can we have a quickie? I__e got four hours to spare, and we are in Intercourse. It__ fate.

I glanced over and saw Wyatt glaring at me. Journey__ __ovin_ Touchin_, Squeezin__ was playing on the radio.__hat?_ I asked.__ou secretly hate me, don__ you._ He gestured toward the radio. __ou can__ stand the thought of me taking a much needed nap and leaving you to drive without conversation. You__e torturing me with this sappy stuff.___t__ Journey. I love this song.__yatt mumbled something under his breath, picked up the CD case, and started looking through it. He paused with a choked noise, his eyes growing huge.__ou__e joking, Sam. Justin Bieber? What are you, a twelve-year old girl?__here__ gonna be one less lonely girl, I sang in my head. That was a great song. How could he not like that song? Still, I squirmed a bit in embarrassment.__ twelve-year old girl gave me that CD,_ I lied. __or my birthday.__yatt snorted. __t__ a good thing you__e a terrible liar. Otherwise, I__ be horrified at the thought that a demon has been hanging out with a bunch of giggling pre-teens.__e continued to thumb through the CDs. __ir Supply Greatest Hits? No, no, I__ wrong here. It__ an Air Supply cover band in Spanish._ He waved the offending CD in my face. __am, what on earth are you thinking? How did you even get this thing?___ome tenant left it behind,_ I told him. __e evicted him, and there were all these CDs. Most were in Spanish, but I__e got a Barry Manilow in there, too. That one__ in English.__yatt looked at me a moment, and with the fastest movement I__e ever seen, rolled down the window and tossed the case of CDs out onto the highway. It barely hit the road before a semi plowed over it.I was pissed. __ou asshole. I liked those CDs. I don__ come over to your house and trash your video games, or drive over your controllers. If you think that will make me listen to thatDubstep crap for the next two hours, then you better fucking think again._____ sorry Sam, but it__ past time for a musical intervention here. You can__ keep listening to this stuff. It wasn__ even remotely good when it was popular, and it certainly hasn__ gained anything over time. You need to pull yourself together and try to expand your musical interests a bit. You__e on a downward spiral, and if you keep this up, you__l find yourself friendless, living in a box in a back alley, stinking of your own excrement, and covered in track marks.__ looked at him in surprise. I had no idea Air Supply led to lack of bowel control and hard core drug usage. I wondered if it was something subliminal, a kind of compulsion programmed into the lyrics. Was Russell Hitchcock a sorcerer? He didn__ look that menacing to me, but sorcerers were pretty sneaky. Even so, I was sure Justin Bieber was okay. As soon as we hit a rest stop, I was ordering a replacement from my iPhone.

He shook his head in exasperation. __re you sure you__e not a Succubus? You seem really obsessed with the sin of lust.___t__ a good sin. I like gluttony an awful lot, too. Sloth has its moments, but I just don__ understand acedia at all. I mean, what the f**k is that anyway? Oh, and greed is good, to quote Gordon Gekko. Anger, envy and pride,_ I ticked them off on my fingers. __ don__ often have much use for them. It__ a shortcoming that I__ hoping to correct in the next millennium or two. I__ not very old; I can__ be expected to have mastered them all yet.___ think you__e worked too hard on some of those,_ he said dryly. __aybe you should switch over to virtues instead. Give yourself a much needed break.__irtues? Yeah, right.__irtues are too difficult,_ I told him, shaking my head. __ook how old you are and you__e hardly made a dent in them. I__l admit, you seem to have zeal nailed, as well as faith and temperance. Self control? I__e got my doubts based on your recent actions. I__ not seeing the kindness, love or generosity, either. That humility thing seems to be pretty far beyond your reach, too. Really, really far. I__ sorry to tell you this, but from what I can see, the sin of pride is a major component of your character. Dude, you__e f**king old. You should have these things pretty well ticked off your shopping list by now. I__ seriously disappointed. Seriously.

I try to never miss the Zumba class since I believe comedy is a great way to start your week....It was great fun, although I had to hold myself back from turning it into a giant mosh pit slam dance. Last time I did that they kicked me out for a month. Today I enjoyed watching an 80 year old lady - with a cane no less - shimmy, her boobs flying like weapons around her waist.