epigrams

There's an epigram tacked to my office bulletin board, pinched from a magazine -- "Wanting to meet an author because you like his work is like wanting to meet a duck because you like pâté.

Being rich or famous is the only profound thing that some people have ever said.

Among other possibilities, money was invented to make it possible for a foolish man to control wise men; a weak man, strong men; a child, old men; an ignorant man, knowledgeable men; and for a dwarf to control giants.

It goes without saying that even those of us who are going to hell will get eternal life__f that territory really exists outside religious books and the minds of believers, that is. Having said that, given the choice, instead of being grilled until hell freezes over, the average sane human being would, needless to say, rather spend forever idling in an extremely fertile garden, next to a lamb or a chicken or a parrot, which they do not secretly want to eat, and a lion or a tiger or a crocodile, which does not secretly want to eat them.

To some believers, being on the pill or using a condom is a nonverbal way of telling God to go to hell.

One needs to be either more brave or more good, because if courage is lacking goodness can substitute, while cowardice is the deficiency of both.

I will now sing another song for your pleasure. Now, if you like Phil Collins...you should be shot in the head.

I think Amy Winehouse's decision not to go to rehab was a bad one. In fact, I think it was the worst idea since Dodi Al Fayed said to Princess Diana, "Ooh, look! A tunnel! Whack that seat belt off and let's have a fuck.

People tell me I shouldn't smoke because it is makes you look like a tit. I use exactly the same argument when people tell me they go to the gym.

In the absence of a formally agreed, worldwide dictionary definition of 'Quotography' (in 2016), here are my two cents worth: 'Quotography is the art of pairing unique quotations with complementary images in order to express thought-provoking ideas, challenging concepts, profound sentiments'.

The human population would probably be way less than a thousand, if ejaculation were not usually accompanied by an orgasm.

Many of the boys and men who are regarded as immature by some females are so deemed merely because they do not want to get married someday _ or soon.

If the food that one ate the night before were somehow able to be seen and identified through one__ clothes throughout the day, millions of employees would each fast ten or so days before their payday.

Some of the people who hate me love some of the sentences that I have written, until they get to the name of the person to whom the sentences are attributed.

Life sometimes reminds us that it is sometimes heartless by giving something or someone we really need to someone who does not need or even want them or it.

A maid__ yard, house, wardrobe, fridge, etc. sometimes also serve as her master__ dustbin or dumpsite.

Some people masturbate to temporarily replace their partners when they are absent, whereas some people do that to temporarily live in the present.

Some people who have been working out regularly for months or even years are still out of shape because the number of cheat days they have in a week exceeds six.