At some point, even the greatest misery begins to fade. Life, or what passes for life, plods on in it's own unending weary footsteps, and somehow we plod along with it, if we stay lucky.
Ileni swallowed hard. "Yes," she said. "I am. But it's all going to be the same, for a very long time. The sorcerers will have all the power, and the assassins will eventually regather and start attacking again... and I haven't made any difference at all.""Well," Evin said, "I think you've made quite a bit of difference to the people whose lives you saved. Speaking as one of them."She stepped away from the edge, closer to him. "Do you regret it?" he asked evenly.His face was half-shadowed, but his eyes were bright and piercing. Not wide with pain and devoid of hope. She felt again his hand, limp and helpless in hers. Felt it tighten as Sorin plummeted past the gray rock. "No," she said. And for at least that moment, it was entirely true.
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Ileni swallowed hard. "Yes," she said. "I am. But it's all going to be the same, for a very long time. The sorcerers will have all the power, and the assassins will eventually regather and start attacking again... and I haven't made any difference at all.""Well," Evin said, "I think you've made quite a bit of difference to the people whose lives you saved. Speaking as one of them."She stepped away from the edge, closer to him. "Do you regret it?" he asked evenly.His face was half-shadowed, but his eyes were bright and piercing. Not wide with pain and devoid of hope. She felt again his hand, limp and helpless in hers. Felt it tighten as Sorin plummeted past the gray rock. "No," she said. And for at least that moment, it was entirely true.
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In the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope.
and I told myself -- as I've told myself before -- that the body shuts down then the pain gets too bad, that consciousness is temporary, that this will pass. But just like always, I didn't slip away. I was left on the shore with the waves washing over me, unable to drown.
Love is stronger than both fear and hope - if you can love the natural beauty around you, the amazing gifts and skills we have, the fact that you are alive to experience life, each moment that you have, and love yourself and those around you just as they are, then there is no need to be owned by fear, or even hope, you just live the best you can, being the truth of that love that you are being, representing the stream of consciousness experiencing itself, always knowing that you will someday return to it again, and flow as part of it infinitely on.
The higher consciousness are the ones who get the most pain.
It__ that short-lived happiness, which empowers us to bear; long-lasting pain in living.