Ben Mitchell

You could say I__ so manly I don__ even allow manly stereotypes to influence my actions

The other day, a friend of a friend said that everyone started out as girls, but boys evolved_ But don__ worry girls, I hit him.

I hope I can never trust my wife. If I trust her it means I know her. If I know her it means I understand her. If I understand her it means I can control her, and if I can control her it would make her boring and uninteresting_ Dear god I hope I can never trust my wife_

No religion can fully accept another religion, that__ the one belief all religions share

My limits know me well enough to stay out of my way.

My greatest strength is an unfocused mind. This is because while you are all thinking of one idea, I__ thinking of five different ideas. My greatest weakness however is an unfocused mind. This is because while I__ supposed to be thinking about one thing, I__ actually thinking of five other things.

I wouldn__ have minded school if they taught you important things like how to have good sex and what brand of wine is the best_ But for some reason they were hell bent on teaching me algebra

Love is the one thing in this world that you should never have to go through alone_ For unreciprocated love is the most soul crushing experience you will ever go through.

I imagine God creating humans was much like cavemen creating fire_ First it sparkles brightly, full of life and beauty. But then it grows, stronger and fiercer until it becomes dangerous and uncontrollable_ Then its creator can only stand on the hill and wait for his creation to die.

By passing your GCSEs you prove that you__e not an idiot_ But by passing your A levels you prove that you__e smart

Now that I__e reached the ripe old age of retirement, I feel it my duty to teach you everything I__e learnt about love, so listen closely. Love is like_ That__ as far as I__e gotten I__ afraid.

Losing your virginity is a lot like when you find out that Santa doesn__ exist_ First you__e slightly disappointed, and then you__e happy because you__e in on the secret

How fickle is my young male heart as it avidly jumps from love to love

Hating Britain is a fundamental part of being British