and I told myself -- as I've told myself before -- that the body shuts down then the pain gets too bad, that consciousness is temporary, that this will pass. But just like always, I didn't slip away. I was left on the shore with the waves washing over me, unable to drown.
Maybe I was supposed to hate Caroline Mathers or something because she__ been with Augustus, but I didn__. I couldn__ see her very clearly amid all the tributes, but there didn__ seem to be much to hate. She seemed to be mostly a professional sick person, like me, which made me worry that when I died they__ have nothing to say about me except that I fought heroically, as if the only thing I__ ever done was Have Cancer.
The Fault in Our Stars
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Maybe I was supposed to hate Caroline Mathers or something because she__ been with Augustus, but I didn__. I couldn__ see her very clearly amid all the tributes, but there didn__ seem to be much to hate. She seemed to be mostly a professional sick person, like me, which made me worry that when I died they__ have nothing to say about me except that I fought heroically, as if the only thing I__ ever done was Have Cancer.
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I believe the universe wants to be noticed. I think the universe is improbably biased toward the consciousness, that it rewards intelligence in part because the universe enjoys its elegance being observed.
My dad finished chewing something and then put his fork down and looked at me. 'The longer I do my job,' he said. 'the more I realize that humans lack good mirrors. It's so hard for anyone to show us how we look, and so hard for us to show anyone how we feel.''That is really lovely,' my mom said. I liked that they liked each other. 'But isn't it also that on some fundamental level we find it difficult to understand that other people are human beings in the same way that we are? We idealize them as gods or dismiss them as animals.''True. Consciousness makes for poor windows, too. I don't think I'd ever thought about it quite that way.
I was struck by an awful thought, the kind that cannot be taken back once it escapes into the open air of consciousness; it seemed to me that this was not a place you go to live. It was a place you go to die.
She cleared her throat. __ryan, I know you__e interviewed a lot of caregivers____oo many,_ Bryan shot back.She inched her chin up a notch. ____ not your typical caregiver. I__ different.__ryan laughed with no humor. __eah, I__e heard that one before__kay, impress me, Delilah Walker. What exactly makes you different?
Bryan, I know you__e interviewed a lot of caregivers____oo many,_ Bryan shot back.She inched her chin up a notch. ____ not your typical caregiver. I__ different.__ryan laughed with no humor. __eah, I__e heard that one before__kay, impress me, Delilah Walker. What exactly makes you different?