Horror can damage your brain" - HAHAHAHA the best joke ever heard (It was said by GreenHollyWood". I really don't believe in that in case I use them to relax!

Substituting the discount rate for the ever increasing chance of death and a dollar for joy, joy today is worth more than joy tomorrow.

Success is relative. We shouldn't compare the financial success between a person born into riches and the one born into abject poverty.

Dark alleys, like social networks, are romantic, because you never know what might happen while I perform there every Caturday night. Cats do know, but won't tell. So don__ even ask.

An Irishman walks into a pub,_ she begins and the bar went silent. __he bartender asks him, __hat'll you have?__ Her Irish accent was spot on. __he man says, __ive me three pints of Guinness, please._ The bartender brings him three pints and the man proceeds to alternately sip one, then the other, then the third until they're gone. He then orders three more.__he bartender says, __ir, no need to order as many at a time. I__l keep an eye on it and when you get low, I'll bring you a fresh one._ The man replies, __ou don't understand. I have two brothers, one in Australia and one in the States. We made a vow to each other that every Saturday night we'd still drink together. So right now, me brothers have three Guinness stouts too, and we're drinking together.___he bartender thought this a wonderful tradition and every week the man came in and ordered three beers._ January__ playing and voice became more solemn, dramatic. __ut one week, he ordered only two._ The crowd oohed and ahhed. __e slowly drank them,_ she continued darkly, __nd then ordered two more. The bartender looked at him sadly. __ir, I know your tradition, and, agh, I'd just like to say that I'm sorry for your loss.___he man looked on him strangely before it finally dawned on him. __h, me brothers are fine - I just quit drinking.

What do you call a rifle with three barrels?A trifle.