restless-heart

Patience is the antidote to the restless poison of the Ego. Without it we all become ego-maniacal bulls in china shops, destroying our future happiness as we blindly rush in where angels fear to tread. In these out-of-control moments, we bulldoze through the best possible outcomes for our lives, only to return to the scene of the crime later to cry over spilt milk.

That__ just the way it goes when you__e going to meet your destiny. Something comes over you and it keeps your heart so stirred that nothing seems impossible_ Well, except for sleep, or taking your mind off of the future." -Kearney

The problem with me is that I cannot focus when she is on my mind. I can__. I probably will make a mistake when writing that paper and will start writing everything I feel about her__he professor will be very happy with that, I am sure. Oh well, such is my life. I guess I__e been attempting my best to forget her for several weeks now. But even in that act of forgetting her, I am remembering her. I am recollecting her and recreating her in my mind. And that__ where everything falls apart. In remembering her, I remember her goodness. In remembering her, I remember her weaknesses and my own. In remembering her, I am remembering myself. Out of that dark cave of mine, I call myself out. And then all of the remembering starts again. I doodle, I twitch, I aim restlessly for some unseen goal. And then my thoughts drift to you. I__l let them stay there for now. Just for a minute. Or two.