pushed

you get to a point when you just don__ want to be pushed anymore. pushed to pretend you__e okay with condescending behavior and disrespectful attitudes. pushed to ignore the determined yearnings of your clearest truth. pushed to engage in conversations and situations that in no way serve your state of peace. pushed to act a bogus part and clap for those who are acting theirs. pushed to be quiet and to stay small. pushed to exist rather than live. you get to a point when it__ all too much, too exhausting, too false. something must change. then you realize that the changes you crave have always been within your power to create. you realize that no one has the might to push you into anything when you are unwilling to be pushed. you realize that you, more effectively than any outside influence, have been your biggest pusher all along. so you stop__ushing and pretending and acting and shrinking. you stop it all, because you can. and you don__ waste too much time regretting that you didn__ do it sooner. you__e suddenly much too busy living your life for such silly regrets.

I am pushed by those who believe in me, but motivated by those who don't.