Terry Pratchett

Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors. And the people there see you differently, too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.

The sun rose slowly, as if it wasn't sure it was worth all the effort.

Juliet's version of cleanliness was next to godliness, which was to say it was erratic, past all understanding and was seldom seen.

High magic requires a great clarity of thought, you see, and women's talents do not lie in that direction. Their brains tend to overheat.

Handle with care. Probably has Views. Do not attempt to kiss hand.

And a woman by herself is missing a man, while a man by himself is his own master. Trousers. That's the secret. Trousers and a pair of socks. I never dreamed it was like this. Put on trousers and the world changes. We walk different. We act different. I see these girls and I think: Idiot's Get yourself some trousers!

Sybil__ female forebears had valiantly backed up their husbands as distant embassies were besieged, had given birth on a camel or in the shade of a stricken elephant, had handed around the little gold chocolates while trolls were trying to break into the compound, or had merely stayed at home and nursed such bits of husbands and sons as made it back from endless little wars._ The result was a species of woman who, when duty called, turned into solid steel.

Every intelligent being, whether it breathes or not, coughs nervously at some time in its life.

Well, the lion is a big ol_ coward, mostly. If you want trouble, you want to tangle with the lioness. They__e killers, and they hunt together. It__ the same everywhere. If you want big grief, look to the ladies.

If women were as good as men they'd be a lot better!

It was sad music. But it waved its sadness like a battle flag. It said the universe had done all it could, but you were still alive.

Granny was an old-fashioned witch. She didn__ do good for people, she did right by them.

Speak softly and employ a huge man with a crowbar.

It's political, sir. Apparently he wants a return to the values and traditions that made the city great, sir." "Does he _know_ what those values and traditions _were_?" said Vimes, aghast.

How can you protect yourself by carrying a sword if you don__ know how to use it?__ot me, sir. Other people. They see the sword and don__ attack me,_ said Maladict patiently.Yes, but if they did, lad, you wouldn__ be any good with it,_ said the sergeant.No, sir. I__ probably settle for just ripping their heads off, sir. That__ what I mean by protection, sir. Theirs, not mine. And I__ get hell from the League if I did that, sir.

Once you were in the hands of a Grand Vizier, you were dead. Grand Viziers were always scheming megalomaniacs. It was probably in the job description: "Are you a devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good, then you can be my most trusted minister.

One of the hardest lessons in young Sam's life had been finding out that the people in charge weren't in charge. It had been finding out that governments were not, on the whole, staffed by people who had a grip, and that plans were what people made instead of thinking.

You can't give her that!' she screamed. 'It's not safe!'IT'S A SWORD, said the Hogfather. THEY'RE NOT MEANT TO BE SAFE.'She's a child!' shouted Crumley.IT'S EDUCATIONAL.'What if she cuts herself?'THAT WILL BE AN IMPORTANT LESSON.