Robin M. King

We had been two sides of the same coin, attached by a force stronger than family or friends. We had been one.

William__ head tilted and the fluorescent lights above us reflected in his eyes, making them glow like translucent sapphires. __ wasn__ sure I had anything here in Providence drawing me back._ He studied my face and then smiled that schoolboy grin from all my memories. __ut I don__ think Providence has seen the last of me yet.

This was it. This would be my final mission. An overwhelming sadness swept over me at the realization. There would be no more racing across campus to replace the missing arm of the Caesar Augustus statue with one made of pink duct tape. My mind would no longer be used as a photographic tool to unveil a terrorist__ plan. No more last-minute science experiments to help rescue a father and daughter from a terrorist organization. I wouldn__ get to rescue myself with the aid of a Millard-enhanced device. No more disguises involving wigs and glasses to save a Van Gogh painting. The Mariinsky Theatre, the Superman building, the Louvre__y stories would disappear, along with my memories. Light had vanished around me as the ocean swallowed me. I__ been unable to save a helpless girl from her evil kidnapper. In the darkness I heard Daly__ voice, clear and strong, almost like he was there. Don__ give up. Fight. Push yourself. Alexandra Stewart can make a masterpiece out of any canvas. He was right__ couldn__ give up. (page 206)

Secrets are like scars. The cut may no longer be there, but the scar__ white line tells a story. Unless you share it, it__ like you__e hiding a part of yourself the whole world can already see. They may not know the how or the why, but they see it just the same.

Do you think they__l ever be a place for us? I mean, do you think there__ a place for someone who lives under the radar, someone who has to pretend, someone who is a spy?_ __es._ Daly said it with such confidence that I sat up in my bed, my cast dangling over the edge. __ow do you know?_ I asked. __here has to be. I don__ usually philosophize, but I do know one thing._ __hat__ that?_ __hat even when we__e pretending, even when we__e hiding under wigs or accents or clothes that aren__ our style, we can__ hide our nature. Just like I knew from the moment I met you that you would choose this life. And just like I knew, when you told me about this mission, that you would agree to help the CIA find this girl. You would sacrifice yourself and your time with your brother to save someone. It__ just who you are._ ____e already messed things up, Daly. What if I__ not good enough? What if I can__ do it?_ __hat__ the thing, though. You__l find a way._ I lay back again and buried the side of my face into my pillow. ____ just not sure how._ __f you continue to think as you__e always thought, you__l continue to get what you__e always got,_ Daly said. I considered that. I wasn__ ready to give up. At least not yet. __hat one is Itosu wisdom, in case you wondered._ I yawned into the phone. __t__ good advice._ ____l let you go. You should be resting. Don__ you have school in the morning?_ He said the last part in a teasing tone. __eah, if I make it through another day at school. Maybe they__l get rid of me__ick me out or something. You__ think I would have inherited some of my mom__ artistic genius._ __an I give you one last bit of advice, Alex?_ __ure._ __hrow it all out the window._ __hat?_ I stared at my open window. A slight breeze blew the gauzelike drapes in and out as if they were a living creature. __verything you__e learned about art, the lines, the colors, the pictures in your head from other artists__ust throw it all out. And throw out everything you__e learned from books and simulations about being a good spy. Don__ try to be like someone else. Don__ force yourself to follow a set of rules that weren__ meant for you. Those work for 99.99% of the people._ __ou__e telling me I__ the .01%?_ I asked skeptically. __o, I__ telling you you__e not even on the scale._ Daly__ soft breathing traveled through the phone line. __ith a mind like yours, you can__ be put in a box. Or even expected to stand outside it. You were never meant to hold still, Alex. You have to stack all the boxes up and climb and keep climbing until you find you. I__ just saying that Alexandra Stewart will find her own way._ The cool night air brushed the skin of my arm and I wished it was Daly__ hand instead. __ou sure have a lot of wisdom tonight,_ I told him. I expected him to laugh. Instead, the line went silent for a moment. __ecause I__ not there. Because I wish I was._ His words were simple, but his message reached inside my heart and left a warmth__ warmth I needed. __hank you, James.___ake care, Alex._ I wanted to say more, to keep him at my ear just a little longer. Yet the words itching to break free couldn__ be said from over two thousand miles away. They needed to happen in person. I wasn__ going home until I found Amoriel. Which meant I had to complete this mission. Not just for Amoriel anymore. I had to do it for me. (page 143)

Before a secret is told, one can feel the weight of it in the atmosphere.