Lois P. Frankel

Sometimes you just need to be selfish to be self-sufficient.

Recognize those times when it's best to do nothing. The weeks and months following a significant loss, including death, divorce, or the incapacitation of a loved one, are fraught with emotions. We typically do not make our best decisions under circumstances such as these. **Avoid the inclination to immediately put your house on the market** cash in all your savings, and move to the south of France, or trust the first person who comes along who says he or she can give you all the help you need.

Give yourself a set period of time to grieve and heal before focusing on financial matters.

Money per se does not make you happy - it's what it enables you to do with your life.

As I mentioned earlier, women get mixed messages in childhood: You can do anything you want... but it wouldn't hurt to find someone who will take good care of you.

When a man's friend wins, a little piece of him dies.