Finley Peter Dunne

No matter whether the Constitution follows the flag or not the Supreme Court follows the election returns.

It is more comfortable to feel that we are a slight improvement on a monkey than such a fallin' off fr'm th' angels.

You can lead a man up to the university but you can't make him think.

I see gr-reat changes takin' place ivry day but no change at all ivry fifty years.

Many a man that couldn't direct ye to th' drug store on th' corner when he was thirty will get a respectful hearin' when age has further impaired his mind.

Th' first thing to have in a libry is a shelf.Fr'm time to time this can be decorated with lithrachure.But th' shelf is th' main thing.

Th' newspaper does ivrything f'r us. It runs th' polis foorce an' th' banks, commands th' milishy, controls th' ligislachure, baptizes th' young, marries th' foolish, comforts th' afflicted, afflicts th' comfortable, buries th' dead an' roasts thim aftherward.

Stories are meant to comfort the afflicted, and afflict the comfortable.