I was hoping to find a way out of here and instead found you.
December 27, 11:00 p.m.My Dear America,I__e never written a love letter, so forgive me if I fail now. . . .The simple thing would be to say that I love you. But, in truth, it__ so much more than that. I want you, America. I need you.I__e held back so much from you out of fear. I__ afraid that if I show you everything at once, it will overwhelm you, and you__l run away. I__ afraid that somewhere in the back of your heart is a love for someone else that will never die. I__ afraid that I will make a mistake again, something so huge that you retreat into that silent world of yours. No scolding from a tutor, no lashing from my father, no isolation in my youth has ever hurt me so much as you separating yourself from me.I keep thinking that it__ there, waiting to come back and strike me. So I__e held on to all my options, fearing that the moment I wipe them away, you will be standing there with your arms closed, happy to be my friend but unable to be my equal, my queen, my wife.And for you to be my wife is all I want in the world. I love you. I was afraid to admit it for a long time, but I know it now.I would never rejoice in the loss of your father, the sadness you__e felt since he passed, or the emptiness I__e experienced since you left. But I__ so grateful that you had to go. I__ not sure how long it would have taken for me to figure this out if I hadn__ had to start trying to imagine a life without you. I know now, with absolute certainty, that is nothing I want.I wish I was as true an artist as you so that I could find a way to tell you what you__e become to me. America, my love, you are sunlight falling through trees. You are laughter that breaks through sadness. You are the breeze on a too-warm day. You are clarity in the midst of confusion.You are not the world, but you are everything that makes the world good. Without you, my life would still exist, but that__ all it would manage to do.You said that to get things right one of us would have to take a leap of faith. I think I__e discovered the canyon that must be leaped, and I hope to find you waiting for me on the other side.I love you, America.Yours forever,Maxon
The One
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December 27, 11:00 p.m.My Dear America,I__e never written a love letter, so forgive me if I fail now. . . .The simple thing would be to say that I love you. But, in truth, it__ so much more than that. I want you, America. I need you.I__e held back so much from you out of fear. I__ afraid that if I show you everything at once, it will overwhelm you, and you__l run away. I__ afraid that somewhere in the back of your heart is a love for someone else that will never die. I__ afraid that I will make a mistake again, something so huge that you retreat into that silent world of yours. No scolding from a tutor, no lashing from my father, no isolation in my youth has ever hurt me so much as you separating yourself from me.I keep thinking that it__ there, waiting to come back and strike me. So I__e held on to all my options, fearing that the moment I wipe them away, you will be standing there with your arms closed, happy to be my friend but unable to be my equal, my queen, my wife.And for you to be my wife is all I want in the world. I love you. I was afraid to admit it for a long time, but I know it now.I would never rejoice in the loss of your father, the sadness you__e felt since he passed, or the emptiness I__e experienced since you left. But I__ so grateful that you had to go. I__ not sure how long it would have taken for me to figure this out if I hadn__ had to start trying to imagine a life without you. I know now, with absolute certainty, that is nothing I want.I wish I was as true an artist as you so that I could find a way to tell you what you__e become to me. America, my love, you are sunlight falling through trees. You are laughter that breaks through sadness. You are the breeze on a too-warm day. You are clarity in the midst of confusion.You are not the world, but you are everything that makes the world good. Without you, my life would still exist, but that__ all it would manage to do.You said that to get things right one of us would have to take a leap of faith. I think I__e discovered the canyon that must be leaped, and I hope to find you waiting for me on the other side.I love you, America.Yours forever,Maxon
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I think timing is better left up to God to decide then religious leaders. I once met a man that brought his wife flowers in the hospital. They held hands, kissed and were as affectionate as any cute couple could be. They were both in their eighties. I asked them how long they were married. I expected them to tell me fifty years or longer. To my surprise, they said only five years. He then began to explain to me that he was married thirty years to someone that didn__ love him, and then he remarried a second time only to have his second wife die of cancer, two years later. I looked at my patient (his wife) sitting in the wheelchair next to him smiling. She added that she had been widowed two times. Both of her marriages lasted fifteen years. I was curious, so I asked them why they would even bother pursuing love again at their age. He looked at me with astonishment and said, __o you really think that you stop looking for a soulmate at our age? Do you honestly believe that God would stop caring about how much I needed it still, just because I am nearing the end of my life? No, he left the best for last. I have lived through hell, but if I only get five years of happiness with this woman then it was worth the years of struggle I have been through.
Finding a soulmate is an easy adventure, but the difficult part admist the game is finding your kind of person.
Love me like Saturday night, like three glasses of champagne, like the room is spinning, like you're drunk on my love.