weddings

For breakfast to be called __n bed_ instead of __n top of a bed,_ the house in which it is about to be eaten has to have at least two rooms (excluding the kitchen); (at least) three, if it has a bathroom.

Many couples spend a great deal of time planning their wedding, but little time planning their marriage.

In Marriage You Learn To Give Up The "Me ness for We ness!

Newspaper columnist Dave Barry once wrote that the motto of the wedding industry is, 'Money can't buy you happiness, so you might as well give your money to us.

I was stunned. I pulled the phone away and looked quizzically at the hole-punched speaker. Aside from the blood obligation to be my sister's maid of honor, it had never occured to me that I would get asked to be in anyone's wedding. I thought we had reached an understanding, the institution of marriage and I. Weddings are the like the triathlon of female friendship: the Shower, the Bachelorette Party, and the Main Event. It's the Iron Woman and most people never make it through. They fall off their bikes or choke on ocean water. I figured if I valued my life, I'd stay away from weddings and they'd stay away from me.

A wedding is for daughters and fathers. The mothers all dress up, trying to look like young women. But a wedding is for a father and daughter. They stop being married to each other on that day.

One of the reasons God did not make a lover for Himself when He made one for Adam is because He knew that fewer people would take Him seriously once He had an ex.

Some women would not cheat, and some would not have cheated, had they each married a man whom they love _ or at least like.

But men are bound to saySome things that, though untrue,Will get you down the aisleUntil you say "I do.

... I regularly frequent St. George';s, Hanover Square, during the genteel marriage season; and though I have never seen the bridegroom's male friends give way to tears, or the beadles and officiating clergy in any way affected, yet it is not at all uncommon to see women who are not in the least concerned in the operations going on -- old ladies who are long past marrying, stout middle-aged females with plenty of sons and daughters, let alone pretty young creatures in pink bonnets, who are on their promotion, and may naturally taken an interest in the ceremony -- I say it is quite common to see the women present piping, sobbing, sniffling; hiding their little faces in their little useless pocket-handkerchiefs; and heaving, old and young, with emotion.

We think we like or love some people until we see them regularly.

Some people will each start investing more of their salary on __heir_ house and spending less of it on __heir_ car or cars only when they start being able to take __heir_ house to work, funerals, weddings, etc.

Taking good care of your husband or wife is the best way to thank their parent or parents for having taken good care of them.

Some people love but will never marry each other. Some are married to but have never loved and will never love each other.

Your relationship or marriage is dead or dying, if you almost always have to remind your partner to miss you (and/or they almost always have to remind you to miss them).

Many a woman would not be in a relationship with or married to her man, if he earned half of what he earns; and many a man would not be in a relationship with or married to his woman, if he earned twice as much as he earns.

Many a woman is in a relationship with or married to her man not because she loves him but only because she likes men like him.

Finding out that you are not your lover__ only lover hurts, but not as much as discovering that you are the side chick _ or the side dick.