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Acid filled Sara__ mouth.It wasn__ fair.That__ what Sara wanted to say. To scream at the top of her lungs.It just wasn__ fair.Lena wasn__ strong. She would bend, not break. She would recover from this tragedy the same easy way she recovered from every other tragedy before.Even if she lost Jared, Lena would always know what it felt like to have his child growing inside of her. She could always hold her baby__ hand and think of holding Jared__. She could see her child laugh and learn and grow and play sports and do school projects and graduate from college and Lena would always, always remember her husband. She would see Jared in her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. On her deathbed, she would find peace in the knowledge that they had made something beautiful together. That even in death, they would both go on living.__ara,_ Faith said. __hat__ happening here?__ara wiped her eyes, angry that she was back in the same dark place she__ started at this morning. __hy does everything come so damn easy to her?_ She struggled to speak. Her throat clenched around every word that wanted to come out of her mouth. __verything just opens up, and she always walks through unscathed and__ Sara had to stop for breath. __t__ just so easy for her. She always has it so goddamn easy.
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Acid filled Sara__ mouth.It wasn__ fair.That__ what Sara wanted to say. To scream at the top of her lungs.It just wasn__ fair.Lena wasn__ strong. She would bend, not break. She would recover from this tragedy the same easy way she recovered from every other tragedy before.Even if she lost Jared, Lena would always know what it felt like to have his child growing inside of her. She could always hold her baby__ hand and think of holding Jared__. She could see her child laugh and learn and grow and play sports and do school projects and graduate from college and Lena would always, always remember her husband. She would see Jared in her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. On her deathbed, she would find peace in the knowledge that they had made something beautiful together. That even in death, they would both go on living.__ara,_ Faith said. __hat__ happening here?__ara wiped her eyes, angry that she was back in the same dark place she__ started at this morning. __hy does everything come so damn easy to her?_ She struggled to speak. Her throat clenched around every word that wanted to come out of her mouth. __verything just opens up, and she always walks through unscathed and__ Sara had to stop for breath. __t__ just so easy for her. She always has it so goddamn easy.

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How do you surrender when every cell of your being is screaming that your life is not working and that you need to do something to make it work? How do you surrender in that moment when jealousies, envy, doubt, rage, resentment all rise up inside you? You accept that you are resisting letting go; you accept that perhaps you are not yet ready to take your hands off the steering wheel; you accept this with kindness to who you are in the moment, being gentle and tender instead of beating yourself over the head with the 'Must hurry up, time is of the essence, everyone is passing me by' train of thought.

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